John 15:5  …Apart from Me you can do nothing (NAS)

Today’s message hits home for me – discipline and self-control. Joyce is reminding use that Discipline in ones life is a necessity to success in all areas – Personal Health, Financial Stability, and every other area in your life.  She is not using the word discipline to reference “punishments” but more of Self-Control.

I tend to be able to commit and stick to that commitment for long periods of time but recently I cannot seem to get the motivation to START what I am looking to discipline myself in like – getting back into working out and loose some weight.  For me my struggle is emotional, I know it. 

When I am not happy I tend to throw ration and caution and self-control to the wind.  Don’t get me wrong, I don’t put myself into danger or anything I just don’t focus on what is best for me – I want to comfort myself.

When I am feeling lost, unloved, unappreciated, and lonely I just throw up my arms and say what the heck just eat it or walking on the treadmill sounds great for me but I have other responsibilities I need to tend to and I don’t have time and I go do tasks that I get instant gratification from, and for me that is in my work. I go to the comfort area in life.

As I am writing this I find myself being reminded of the words “don’t look to others for validation, look UP and your father is always there for you” be happy with yourself and look to please God not “earthly” partners.  That in pleasing God and looking to him for that validation and that love will free your heart to love others unconditionally and in turn those partners will be so filled with joy that they too will turn in love you.  (though you are no longer searching for it, it becomes a greater reward)  I need to practice this – I am terrible at it and currently am in a huge struggle!  I am holding back things (love things and feelings) waiting to get mine from my husband and it becomes this vicious circle and neither one of us are happy.  I just fight it because I don’t want to always be the giver in our lives and it feels that way so I become resentful and there goes that cycle again!

Today I commit to Jesus that I need to focus on ME and discipline myself to a life that I and He would like me to have.  Listen a little harder for when God speaks to me about choices I am making (because he always whispers to us to try and keep us on track) and work to stay on a path he has chosen for me.  And to take action when I am so inclined to and not hold back.  I need to focus more on the be me and do for others (because I have such a servant heart) and trust that the rewards for my efforts do come and that GOD WILL PROVIDE!  (wow this post turned into more than I intended to say but I am not going to edit it, this is God speaking through me in what I need!)

Dear Lord I Pray…

Dear Jesus thank you for overflowing my heart this morning and opening my eyes to where I need to be with you and inside me!  It is true what Joyce Meyer said in her lesson today – we can change the outside and make it look like we are “changed” but if the inside is the same we are NOT changed at all just putting on a facade and then just unhappy.  Lord I will call on your strength and your support in this “work in progress” of discipline and being true inside and out!  I want to start working out – I want to get back into eating healthier and doing the Isa program – I want to help my husband get healthier too.  I promise to out stretch my arms to you O’Lord and reach for your hand of support – I promise to turn to you when I need validation and support so to move forward and not be resentful in my life to those I love… Lord you are an amazing God and I thank you for having me in your family! IN YOU NAME I PRAY…AMEN